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sledging

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Notes from the pavilion for October 17th

last year, mid-October

Links of note from the past 24 hours:

The Australia-India spat

last year, at the start of October

So Australia and India are embroiled in a spat all about Australia’s favourite tactic: on-field aggression. The Indians claim Ricky Ponting’s team have been using “harsh words” to their batsmen, while Australia suggest that India have misinterpreted “what aggressive cricket means”.

I can’t help feel this has been blown out of all proportion - by both parties. Australia are renowned for their tough-talking bullshit on the field of play, and equally famous for not being able to take it themselves. Remember England in the Ashes in 2005? Simon Jones flinging the ball into Matthew Hayden; Paul Collingwood, and others, shouldering up to an incensed Hayden. The bullies are always the biggest of cowards.

But I’m on Australia’s side for once, and not out of sympathy owing to their utter humiliation by England today in the Rugby World Cup (yeehaw!). India: for God’s sake, grow up and get on with it. If the nasty Australians really get out of hand, there are enough stump mics and cameras to witness the event. There’s a sense that India are appealing to the world, that somehow they are being victimised by Australia. Australia do this to every other team and although it occasionally boils over, it’s just part of their game.

It doesn’t always work for other teams though. India should just forget about trying to out-sledge them - it is not working.

Your thoughts?

Should stump mics be turned off?

last year, at the start of August

Peter Moores, the England coach, has responded to criticism of England’s behaviour in the 2nd Test against India by suggesting stump microphones are switched off.

“There must be some things that are left on the field to be fair to the players,” Moores said in response to criticism of England’s incessent chatter during the Trent Bridge Test. “They should be allowed to go out there and play the game without being worried that everything they actually say is going to be broadcast. It’s something we’ve discussed as a management team and we’ve spoken to the match referee about it.”

The International Cricket Council rules that stump microphones be turned on whenever a ball is live - that is, when a batsman takes guard, between a bowler’s run-up to the time the ball reaches or passes a batsman, and from the time a fielder throws the ball back to a team-mate or onto the stumps.

It’s a confident reaction from a coach so new to international cricket and I agree, in part. Players should be allowed, within the law, to go hell for leather out there and say whatever they wish. This isn’t Question Time or an audience with the Queen. This is professional sport played by well-paid, talent individuals (supposedly) at the top of their game - and sledging is part of their armoury.

But, as a viewer, only once or twice have I ever heard a “live” sledge (Dean Jones was caught out, remember). Sky always tend to turn it down for viewers - though Matt Prior is, admittedly, probably the loudest England wicketkeeper I’ve ever heard, so it’s entirely plausible his yelps break through. And so what if they do? So what if we hear Prior, for example, call a batsman a gimp - or Zaheer thinks Pietersen’s a hermaphrodite. This has been going on since WG Grace first threw away his razor. Is society so pathetically sensitive, or naive, that it can’t handle the odd bit of banter between players fighting tooth and nail?

And if so…just turn it off and let everyone get on with it. If anything goes too far, the match referee can slap them with a fine or whatever.

You? Should they be turned on or off? Vote below, then leave your comments. If you can’t see the poll below, click here.

{democracy:31}

Kevin Pietersen’s hundred against West Indies

last year, mid-May


© Getty Images
Another quite brilliant innings. He is one of the most expert pacers of an innings I have seen; to watch him build the foundation in his first fifty, then explode during the second, was quite special. But what made it even more special was yet another confrontation with the opposition, this time with Chris Gayle.

Things were getting seriously heated, for no apparent reason. It went on for a good hour or hour-and-a-half, with Gayle chirping from the slips and Pietersen giving it back at the end of each over. There were shoulder barges, glaring, swearing, petulance from the bowler, daring-do from the batsman. Inside this Test, an entirely separate and very personal battle was taking place.

Aptly, Pietersen eventually fell to Gayle. They smiled, shook hands, and off he went. They may not be best mates, but they were big enough to acknowledge one another’s performance and not let their disagreement become bigger than the game. It was cricket at its most compelling.

Kumar Sangakkara sledging Shaun Pollock

last year, mid-March

Really mmmmarvellous piece of sledging there from Kumar.

Nixon’s sledging tips

last year, at the start of March

Photo of Paul Nixon celebrating

Paul “Badger” Nixon, who I’ve yet to see play, is the subject of a recent post at SMH’s The Tonk. Or rather, Badger’s sledging is the focus. They’ve reprinted some of his best, as originally found at The Sunday Times last week.

To Matthew Hayden (whom Nixon claimed expressed nothing but contempt for him): “Hey, Matty, this could be your last knock for Australia, mate. Hey, mate, don’t throw it all away, not in your last knock for your country.”

To Andrew Symonds: “Ah, Symo, great to see you, mate. How’s everyone, the family? I know you, Symo. If you edge me and I take the catch, I’m going to send you a copy of the scorecard to your home, every day for a year.”

To Ricky Ponting: “Ricky, I don’t think you’re that good at picking up a slow ball.” And believing it’s better to get the skipper’s mind off the game, get him out of the present, he adds: “What about the team for next week, Ricky - picked it yet? I saw those jazzy shoes you had made for yourself - very cool.”

To Michael Clarke, who had changed the sticker on his bat: “That old sticker, Michael, it was always lucky for you. The new one’s not going to bring you the same luck, wait and you see.” When Clarke replied that Nixon was nothing but a club cricketer, Nixon shot back: “How’s it going to feel, Michael, to be caught by a club cricketer? You know what, you’re going to make a club cricketer’s day.”

Not a patch on other sledges but brilliantly irritating.

Postcards from the Sledge (10 of 10)

2 years ago, at the end of November

The last of 10 postcards from Postcards from the Sledge. It’s the end of our exclusive run, and many thanks to Beach for allowing them here. Hopefully I’ve helped him sell a few. In 24 hours, the first ball will be hurled down in Brisbane and the sledging can really start.

Australian Whine

(1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10)

Postcards from the Sledge (9 of 10)

2 years ago, mid-November

The ninth of 10 postcards from Postcards from the Sledge

You're only good at swimming

This has added relevance as Ian Thorpe is due to retire, apparently…

(1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9)

Postcards from the Sledge (3 of 10)

2 years ago, at the end of October

(1 | 2 | 3)

The third of 10 postcards from Postcards from the Sledge

Glenn McGrath the carthorse

Postcards from the Sledge (2 of 10)

2 years ago, at the end of October

(1 | 2)

The second of 10 postcards from Postcards from the Sledge

Glenn McGrath the carthorse

Postcards from the Sledge (1 of 10)

2 years ago, at the end of October

Beach, a comic artist, emailed me yesterday with details of a new set (Postcards from the Sledge) of postcards he has drawn and designed - and they’re absolutely superb. Based on cricket sledges between England and Australia (mainly), they’re unique to say the least and great fun.

Front Cover of Postcards from the Sledge

Beach has kindly donated a copy for me to review but, in the meantime, we’re going to be showing ten of them here on the blog, starting today, as a countdown to the first Test at Brisbane. A new one will appear every third day. Of course, you shouldn’t just wait for them to show up here…go and buy your own! Here’s the first:

And visit his site for more information.

The Dean Jones ‘terrorist’ remark

2 years ago, at the start of August

This struck me as the most stupid, irresponsible comment I have heard from a TV analyst on the game since, well…since for ever.

Dean Jones - an aggressive batsman turned chirpy, excitable commentator - said the following (which I put on CI…too tired to rewrite it, sorry)

Dean Jones, the former Australia Test batsman turned TV commentator, has been sacked by his employers, Ten Sports, after being heard calling Hashim Amla a ‘terrorist’ on live television during the fourth day’s play between Sri Lanka and South Africa at Colombo.

When Amla, who is a devout Muslim, took the catch to dismiss Kumar Sangakkara, Jones was heard to say “the terrorist has got another wicket”.

Even if this was said in jest, and there is no indication that it was, you can’t offer such flippant, racist remarks on live TV. Those that know Jones, and I’m not one of them, will no doubt argue that he is not a racist - and, to be honest, such a statement does not make him one either. It’s just bloody stupid, upsetting for Hashim Amla’s family and not something you would expect anyone in the public eye to get away with.

And he hasn’t. He’s been flown back to Australia immediately and has lost his job. Can’t see him ever coaching India, if indeed he wanted to, or working in cricket again.

Scott is going to follow this up in a separate piece some time in the morning. Your thoughts in the meantime are very welcome…I imagine this could go on for some time.

Stiff Upper Lips and Baggy Green Caps: A Sledger’s History of the Ashes

2 years ago, mid-July

Stiff Upper Lips and Baggy Green Caps: A Sledger\'s History of the Ashes

Stiff Upper Lips and Baggy Green Caps: A Sledger’s History of the Ashes
Published: November 2, 2006

This looks worth buying. Not out ’til November, obviously…just a couple of weeks before the series starts again, but could help you get through the long winter mornings with the radio glued to your ears (or, we hope, glued to Cricinfo instead…!).

Synopsis
The Anglo-Australian rivalry that began at the Melbourne cricket ground on 15 March 1877 has featured not just heroic deeds with bat and ball but also, in the words of one journalist, ’some of the loudest rows, fiercest finger-pointing and most unpleasant facial hair in the history of sport’. “Stiff Upper Lips and Baggy Green Caps” brings together the 500 wittiest and most wounding insults from 128 years of Ashes test matches. It shows the cricketing heroes of England and Australia to be as gifted at the coarse arts of insult and abuse as at the finer arts of batting and bowling - from the chilly diplomatic exchanges and hilarious crowd barracking that accompanied England’s controversial Bodyline tour of 1932-3 to the cruelly memorable ’sledging’ of today’s game, as practised by such masters of the genre as Shane Warne and Glenn McGrath. The thrilling Ashes series of 2005 has whetted appetites for the next chapter in sport’s oldest international contest beginning with the first test match in Brisbane on 23 November 2006. “Stiff Upper Lips and Baggy Green Caps” makes a tasty appetizer before the main course begins…

About the Author
Jonathan L’Estrange works in publishing and lives in Oxford. When he is not gardening, cooking or walking in the Cotswolds, he muses on whether the time might have finally come to subscribe to Sky for the cricket.

What’s a dill?

2 years ago, at the start of April

Ah, splendid. Wraye emails to reveal the two words Shane Warne uttered in earshot of the stump mic were “Fucking dill” and “softcock”. There’s a bit of a hoohar going on about the microphone, which has provided immense amusement to me and no doubt most people - but not Australia. They were unaware their poetry was being broadcast, and would like to be left alone to abuse and torment South Africa in private. Fair enough if you ask me.

What, though, is a dill? Because for most of my life, my brother’s called me a dill-head, dill-brain and a f****** dill-weed (in a brotherly sort of way you understand). I always took them as a compliment, but now that I’m significantly taller than him, I might have to take issue with the term dill!

Ponting the ’smart arse’

2 years ago, mid-January

Lou Rowan, former Test umpire, has branded Ricky Ponting a ’smart arse’ and says he’s a disgrace to his country. Just put this up on Cricinfo.

“Ponting is a smart arse and a disaster as leader. The conduct of him and his players is absolutely disgraceful,” Rowan told Fox Sports. “He has no control over his players. It is an insult to former players and people associated with the game.”

Thoughts?

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