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ned-flanders
Ned Flanders uses Statsguru
By Will 2 years ago, at the end of January, 3 Comments »
Ned Flanders – aka John Buchanan – uses Cricinfo’s flagship geek-ahoy app, Statsguru. No great surprise I suppose, given that Buchanan makes Bill Frindall look vaguely hip and groovy. But it’s always interesting hearing it being used by coaches, and for what application.
3 Comments »Buchanan’s revamp
By Will 3 years ago, mid-November, 9 Comments »
John Buchanan (right) has come out of hiding and suggested a revamp of world cricket.
“This equality debate keeps bubbling to the surface and means that there is a serious issue there,” Buchanan told the Age. “I think it mightn’t be a bad thing if the ICC looked at some rule relaxations, which might allow a more even distribution of players around the world.
“Most young cricketers in Australia grow up wanting to play for Australia, but I’m sure there would be quite a few who, when they get to about 25 or 26 and realise they probably won’t get a chance to wear the baggy green, would still be happy to play international cricket anywhere. The problem at the moment is that there is a long qualification period and, by the time that’s up, the player and the other country probably lose interest.”
It’s a fascinating idea, certainly, but is this really the solution to bridging the gap between Australia and the rest? There were some fairly catty texts from some of you on my last post, with a suggestion that I was somehow a) angered at Australia’s dominance and b) that I was proposing they are the ones with the problem. Sorry if that’s how it came across. Yes, I am angry by how dominant they are – I am an Englishman, and it pains me to see our arch enemies so far ahead of the pack. But I’m realistic enough to know the onus is on the rest of us to catch up.
My concern with Buchanan’s idea is that it dilutes the very meaning of representing one’s country. We are in an era which allows those with the right parents to play for countries other than those of their birth, and I’m not against that in principle. But I don’t see this as a solution whatsoever. If anything, the madness of his idea says enough about the gravity of the problem.
9 Comments »Buchanan saves the kookiest ideas till last
By Scott 4 years ago, at the end of December, 18 Comments »
Sydney is not only the swansong for Shane Warne and Glenn McGrath; it is also the last Test for John Buchanan as Australian coach. And not a moment too soon, if his latest media intervention is anything to go by.
Speaking to reporters at the MCG this morning, Buchanan said Australia was hoping for more of a challenge from England, which he thought had played without aggression, self-belief or thought of challenging the opposition for large parts of the Ashes series.
“I’m hoping that they really enjoy the New Year, come back with a new resolve and are really ready to take us on head-on in Sydney,” Buchanan said.
“I think we’ve been tested at certain periods of time but England haven’t been able to sustain their skills through the course of a five-day Test match. We’re quite looking forward to that in Sydney.
Short of baring his arse at the England team bus, I can’t think of a more insulting thing that Buchanan could have done. As an Australian, I can tell you that I wouldn’t have been too impressed if Duncan Fletcher had come out before the Oval Test in 2005 daring Australia to fire up.
It is a well established rule in all sports, not just cricket, that when speaking to the media of your opposition, you speak of them respectfully, and give them their due as worthy opponents. It does not matter if Australia are playing England, Zimbabwe, or Andorra at Test cricket.
When it comes to religion, I am an atheist. However, I am a devout believer in the cricketing Gods, and I fear their wrath. Buchanan’s actions could provoke a powerful response.
And I give thanks to all the Great Cricketing Gods that this is Buchanan’s last Test in charge. I’ll miss Warnie and Pigeon. Not sure I’ll miss Ned Flanders though.
18 Comments »Cricketing lookalikes
By Will 4 years ago, mid-October, 17 Comments »
Patrick is doing grand things with his blog. He’s proving that a broadsheet correspondent can react and adapt to the slightly more relaxed format, all the while maintaining his own style across both. Other papers and large media establishments have adopted blogs with worrying bandwagonnery, forgetting that it remains an editorial tool; the best blogs are well written, be that by a fan or an editor. The emphasis really must remain on quality content, not just the fanfare of joining in the party (and putting up your hand). I am as guilty as most of writing bullshit, as the rest of this post perfectly demonstrates – but at least I’m a consistent waffler!
If you haven’t read his blog yet, do.
He asked me for some lookalikes (see his post) and the only one I could come up with, off the top of my cranium, was Ned Flanders and John Buchanan. I’m surprised the Barmy Army haven’t cottoned onto it yet; perhaps they will this winter with cries of “Okily-dokily-doo”. In fact, as depressingly cheery Ned is, I’d rather him at a press conference than most coaches.
“Hididdily-ho, paradise dwellers”
“Hello, John. Happy with today’s performance, or do you feel you’re perhaps a hundred runs short?”
“Hot diggity! Indeedily-doodily-do!”
“Yyyyep, moving on…”
Incidentally, “Ned’s three Cs” are: Clean living, chewing thoroughly, and a daily dose of vitamin “church”. Loser.
So – your lookalikes, please.
Incidentally I’ve never really bought the Simpsons thing. I think it’s a bit like Marmite, but not nearly as tasty. I was further put off when I heard Richard, of Richard and Judy “fame”, said it was the best thing since sliced bread; he really is a twit. And continuing this tremendously pointless ramble, I saw him not long ago in a dingy pub in London. He double-parked his Jag outside, rushed in with a face like thunder and stormed to the gents. No sooner had I alerted the entire establishment of a TV personality in our midst – and Richard Madely – than he sprinted out again and flew off in his car.
Here endeth the waffle.
17 Comments »