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Loading ...If he actually sets two slips, no gully and no third man, then this is kind of redundant, really. Still bloody hilarious.
Belly: The Art Of Catpaincy
By Alan Tyers 4 months ago Add your comment below
It was really good being captain of the England Lions side this week ‘cos I got to do tossing a coin and telling people where to stand and in the dressing room I even got my own special captain’s seat like James T Kirk and I got a bit of paper and sellotape and I wrote “Ian Bell Catpain” on it so people would know it was my special seat but I realised that I hadn’t spelled it as good as I might have done so I tried to go over it with tippex but that never really worked too well so in the end it just said “Ian Bell Ca-blobble” you know like sort of a smudged smeary thing.
Mr Miller that’s in charge of selectioning come in the dressing room and he looks at the special captain’s seat and he says: “starts out looking very nice but goes to pieces pretty quickly” and he made a little note in his notebook so I don’t know if that’s good or bad really but all I can do is keep focused and keep scoring runs for my county and keep working hard on my spelling.
I was also in charge of choosing all the food that we would have for tea so I got alphabetti spaghetti AND chicken nuggets but I couldn’t decide if we should have ice-cream for pudding or Angel Delight and I guess that’s what they talk about when they say that part of leadership is making the hard choices. At the end of the day, ice-cream’s record speaks for itself so I’ve gone with that.
Tossing the coin was pretty cool as well. I walked out there with Ricky Ponting and we were having a bit of banter, like two prize fighters sizing each other up you might say. I says: “Heads or tails, Ricky?” and he says “Did you get that coin out of your piggy bank you little pommie squit?” but Ian Bell is a much more composeder cricketer than the one that admittedly had a tough baptism of fire against Australia in the early days of his international career and I looked him right in the eye, well not exactly, but I looked at the ground where he was standing, and I says: “Actually I don’t have a piggy bank anymore” and he knew he was in a streetfight right away.
Alan Tyers rifled through Ian Bell’s gmail account
Tags: ian-bell, ricky-ponting |
2 Responses to “Belly: The Art Of Catpaincy”
July 5th, 2009 at 2.13 pm
July 14th, 2009 at 11.09 am
Bliss
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