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Loading ...If he actually sets two slips, no gully and no third man, then this is kind of redundant, really. Still bloody hilarious.
Belly: The Art Of Catpaincy
By Alan Tyers last year, at the start of July Add your comment below
It was really good being captain of the England Lions side this week ‘cos I got to do tossing a coin and telling people where to stand and in the dressing room I even got my own special captain’s seat like James T Kirk and I got a bit of paper and sellotape and I wrote “Ian Bell Catpain” on it so people would know it was my special seat but I realised that I hadn’t spelled it as good as I might have done so I tried to go over it with tippex but that never really worked too well so in the end it just said “Ian Bell Ca-blobble” you know like sort of a smudged smeary thing.
Mr Miller that’s in charge of selectioning come in the dressing room and he looks at the special captain’s seat and he says: “starts out looking very nice but goes to pieces pretty quickly” and he made a little note in his notebook so I don’t know if that’s good or bad really but all I can do is keep focused and keep scoring runs for my county and keep working hard on my spelling.
I was also in charge of choosing all the food that we would have for tea so I got alphabetti spaghetti AND chicken nuggets but I couldn’t decide if we should have ice-cream for pudding or Angel Delight and I guess that’s what they talk about when they say that part of leadership is making the hard choices. At the end of the day, ice-cream’s record speaks for itself so I’ve gone with that.
Tossing the coin was pretty cool as well. I walked out there with Ricky Ponting and we were having a bit of banter, like two prize fighters sizing each other up you might say. I says: “Heads or tails, Ricky?” and he says “Did you get that coin out of your piggy bank you little pommie squit?” but Ian Bell is a much more composeder cricketer than the one that admittedly had a tough baptism of fire against Australia in the early days of his international career and I looked him right in the eye, well not exactly, but I looked at the ground where he was standing, and I says: “Actually I don’t have a piggy bank anymore” and he knew he was in a streetfight right away.
Alan Tyers rifled through Ian Bell’s gmail account
Tags: ian-bell, ricky-ponting |
2 Responses to “Belly: The Art Of Catpaincy”
July 5th, 2009 at 2.13 pm
July 14th, 2009 at 11.09 am
Bliss
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